The Battle Against Cancer-25(The new dawn)

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The series of The Battle Against Cancer is the illness record from August 2008 until end of December 2010.

The following article is continued from March 31, The Battle Against Cancer-24.


Two years have passed in August 2010 since the discovery of the cancer..


It seems that the time flew so fast since the discovery of the cancer. However, there were series of cruel things that I had to go through.

In terms of health, there was a discovery of stage four Oropharynx cancer metastasized to the lymph node of the left side neck.

I went through the combined treatment of the chemotherapy and the radiation therapy for two months followed by the surgery of the dissection of the left side lymph node.

There was continuous doubt of the metastasis during the periodical observation.

Prognostic symptom such as dizziness, lightheadedness, loss of taste, reduction in the amount of saliva secretion had occurred. And there was continuous fear of the doubt of the possible metastasis of the cancer.

The business was dropping due to the recession that was said to be once in 100 years.

After I got out of the hospital, I had exerted my best efforts to rebuild the company.

However, as I was quite convinced that I would not live long, I had decided to close the company while having enough funds to distribute to the employee and finally closed the company on May 10, 2010.


Under such circumstances, I had lost my health as well as my company and the personal assets.

After I became independent, for 20 years until the cancer was found, I got up at 5 a.m. in the morning and done work out from 6 a.m. before I went to the company.

I didn’t smoke and only drank socially. I took well care of what I was eating.

The company was also becoming as the leading company in Japan to produce European modern casual furniture, without losing the original European taste yet to fit into the life style of the Japanese people.

We were in the process to gradually shift our sale route to the direct Web shops from the conventional sales channel through the retailers.

I truly thought that my life was over.

It is reported that in Japan, over 30,000 people are committing suicide annually.

Moreover, the people of fifties and sixties are at the most. The main reasons are said to be health and financial reasons, according to the survey.

In the past, I was just listening to the news of the number of the increasing people committing suicide, due to the health and/or financial reasons, as the news of the other people.

But through the struggle I went through in two years, I was able to understand the mental conditions of the people who were mentally cornered and looked at such news very seriously and with the compelling feeling.

Cancer, brain disease and heart disease are ranked at top three for committing suicide as far as the health matter is concerned.

People from the same generation from the 50s and 60s are at the center in the fugure.

One day it was shown on TV about the documentary of the family whose family member had committed suicide.

I was able to understand the feelings of the family so well that the tears were coming out quite naturally.

It was said that the person who committed suicide had taken a surgery of cancer and quit company so that he could concentrate in the treatment.

However, he decided to cut off his life as the result of battling against the invisible fear of metastasis and being mentally cornered.

On the other hand, there was another TV program showing an old man who was in the hospice and whose life expectancy was very short.

He was saying

“I am so happy and delightful to be alive now.”


By watching two different programs, it made me think very deeply.

Suffering the same illness, one had decided to cut off his life whereas the other is saying that he was happy that he was having the life.


I looked back about myself.

I suffered two illness out of three major illness that people are committing suicide , i.e., cancer, brain disease. I had also closed the company and lost the assets that I had built.

However, I was thinking

“What is the true happiness and unhappiness?”

“Am I not thinking to try to change the past that you can not change? And also trying to escape or look away from the future yet to come?”

And I really thought

“Should I not think that I am happy that I am giving a life by some great force?”


I thought the road to the happiness was indeed to accept the reality in front of you.

Continued

都倉 亮 について

1953年生まれ。幼少の頃11年ドイツで過ごし、アメリカンスクールに学ぶ。慶大卒後三井物産に13年勤務。その後会社経営を経て現在執筆を中心に活動。日本の素晴らしい面、世界基準に変えねばならない面を長年の海外生活で培った目で発信して行きたいと思います。
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